The Life of a Human Lie Detector

I was out at a social gathering recently, and someone asked what I do for a living.

Not wanting to throw it out there, I said, "I'm a trainer."

My talking companion continues, "Oh really?  Who do you train?"

Trying to slow or stop the inquiry of information, I continue to reply with short answers, "Law Enforcement".

Inevitably, though, the next question comes, "What do you train?"

Not one bit interested to lie, though wishing the inquiry had stopped earlier for their sake, I say, "Human behavior and deception."

And the funniest things happen when people have secrets.  They bolt the first instant they can.

And the manner in which they bolt is usually so bold, it causes me to watch in disbelief every time.

Every time.

My internal dialogue is always the same, "I can't believe this" -- though, of course, I can.  It just never gets old or boring.

People who do this couldn't wear a bigger beacon on their back that says "I'm HOT" and not the hot sexy type, folks.  Hot on fire with a story or two!

I then chuckle and wait to find the golden goose and it always comes out from someone.

And this day was no different.  That person didn't tell me a lie, but they told others a whopper and when I heard others repeat it, I knew it instantly.  Just sadly others fell for it.

I just listen, smile and keep my mouth closed.  It's not my place to expose one's secrets, which causes another funny side effect.  Because I don't call people out on their lies, they think I don't have any talent.  Sorry to tell them who that joke is on...